10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.