10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "No river, no fish."
• Welcome to kicker school
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.