10 Random Poker Quotes

• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT