10 Random Poker Quotes

• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.