10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.