10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss