10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• It's Free To Fold...
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."