10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.