10 Random Poker Quotes

• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!