10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)