10 Random Poker Quotes

• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."