10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'