10 Random Poker Quotes

• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth