10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?