10 Random Poker Quotes

• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester