10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?