10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"