10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Poker is for loners.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack