10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels