10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet