10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth