10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.