10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."