10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Poker is for fat, American losers.