10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers