10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A
• Welcome to kicker school
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"