10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.