10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain