10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.