10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.