10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers