10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls