10 Random Poker Quotes

• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.