10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.