10 Random Poker Quotes

• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event