10 Random Poker Quotes

• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester