10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.