10 Random Poker Quotes

• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.