10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.