10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'