10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike