10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Poker is for loners.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim