10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.