10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.