10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.