10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.