10 Random Poker Quotes

• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?