10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes