10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo