10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Welcome to kicker school
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi